healing from a trickster soul

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crisp sunset train
my heart went insane
all it felt was pain
your trickster heart
tore my soul apart
false from the start
sweetgrass dreams
bulged at the seams
heart ache sunset beams
never was smart
with matters of the heart
now a new start
learn of love anew
from a heart that’s true
obviously not from you
——————–
healing from a broken heart and a deceived soul is one of the hardest journeys I can imagine. loving a stranger who never intended to love you back is the cruelest karma. what did I do? whatever the lesson was intended to be I truly see how I would never have wanted that the victim be me. but I know what it is to love someone who didnt love me. ok . now I see how my ex felt. I get it. the next one will love me like I love him. this experience taught me that I can love, after all. cheers.  to new love and to being loved! I know my writing is raw but it is how I can best sort ALL this shit out.. 😉

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Sometimes at Night

sometimes at night,
the silence is the loudest.
the solitude is amplified
and the sadness
wraps its arms around me
like smoke from lit sage
in a ceremony for healing

sometimes at night,
the quiet haunts me
distant songs and drum beat
aching for yesterday
ghost dancers sway
taking me home
to the lands of my ancestors

sometimes at night
I remember that moment
you came into my life
made sense of my song
the echo in my heart
the struggle to survive
made sense to me

sometimes at night
I remember your battles
your Wounded Knee
using a colonizers language
to channel spirits
that haunt your soul
when the wind howls at night

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Fortress of Solitude

when that song plays
I hear your breath
deep and sweet
it touches my neck
I can feel your touch
your smooth hand
touches my arm
I hear your soul
gently crooning to mine
taking me home
yesterday
is always on my mind
tomorrow
is always on my mind
today
is the furthest planet from here
a fortress of solitude
because you aren’t here
you’ll never be here
today is the reality
the nightmare
I want to wake up
next to you
from.

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untitled

the days have turned into weeks
the weeks turned into an eternity
I thought we had forever
but eternity is much longer
especially when your silence
hangs heavy in the sky of forever
dew laden apples smell sweet and fresh
falling to the earth when they are ripe
our love was but a miniscule blip
registering 1. 2 on the Richter Scale
though picnic my heart
it was not enough to reach through
the haze that clouded your memory
your soul cluttered and chaotic
too many memories talking to you
driving you crazy
driving you further from me
I miss you everyday
i can breathe through the pain
I can see the sun through the clouds
I know the grass is under the snow
I send you Light every chance I get
one day you will feel the warmth
and relish it’s comforting warmth
feel its embrace
remember the wind
rejuvenate your soul
feel the coolness of fresh water
wash away your discontent
the wistful smoke of burning sage
will cleanse and awaken your soul
your eternity will become clear
one day your forever will be enlightened
one day your forever will be
full of rainbows of hope
light of contentment
maybe if you let it…

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misted encounter

the mist in my dreams
shrouds true meaning
blurs my soul’s intent
I seen you wander by
inhale
burnt rubber invasion
eyes glazed
you unkempt hair
tangle underbrush
wayward waste in disarray
the wind blew you to me
in my dreams last night
exhale
I felt your rage
the tension attacked my core
I felt the anguish of your soul
scraping my insides
death chamber walls
scarring my own soul
jarring my senses
red flashes of anger
rage of your spirit
inhale
sweet sage gently entries
your ravenous soul
slowly ebbing the tide
the full moon tirade
your soul is calming
disappearing
back into the mist
exhale

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